Life changes. Well mine certainly does. Sitting outside this am in the cool morning I thought again how much this is so. A quick time for reflection. Gone is the deep depression which consumed me for some years. In its place is now a quiet acceptance and peace that my life is on track.
Gone are the morning frenetic thoughts that would twirl around trying to make sense of myself and my surroundings. I no longer find words spill rapidly in my mind. Perhaps its the change in my work, my home, my interests.
I look back and see that photography and writing gave way to art and drawing. I finally started reading novels again. I no longer feel the need to fight mentally. Yet at the same time the sense of wonder at my surroundings in this now not so new city have subsided to an amazement that I have now been here 2 and a half years. I wonder where the time has flown.
Reflecting now I see that the work I have been doing the past year is one I love. It suits me so well. Does not cause me stress but allows my work days to be completely filled. Many would say my work must be boring, yet for me and my very analytical brain it is perfect. Training others in a clinical database. Problem solving and working with developers to improve the software for our clinical services.
It suits me beautifully. Opportunities to traipse across the city and surrounds and meet many beautiful people in our clinics. And I am surprised at the positive reactions. Yes it boosts my ego but it fills my soul with joy to interact with so many lovely people.
We are all on the same wavelength. Working to improve the health of our people. And I see the changes that have occurred over the past few years. Perhaps we have finally got it right. I consider awhile the impact our business model has made. The questions I have lead me to consider whether I pursue a doctorate. I’m not sure just yet. There is too much to do with my current work load. Perhaps in the near future.
I stop to consider how our homes reflect back on us. The new rental is larger, so much light flows through. The yard so much larger so that I don’t hear my neighbours conversations. The open space to sit and do my art work. Company. The latter such a blessing. To share with a good male friend. I learn that not all males are the same. I’m blessed to share with one who loves to cook, help out, talk and share thoughts. We have both learned to relax more in our own ways. Good company. We both continue to heal our own selves by sharing a house.
My other special male. Not just a friend but someone very dear. We teach each other how different the opposite sex can be. After so many years it is an eye opener. We learn and heal each other and talk about our common interest and love of healing and spirituality.
I realise how much my life has changed from close interaction with two very special and ordinary males. From the wonderful people I share my work day with. The support they have given me and allowed me to return. To accept and allow myself in fact encourage me to become the person I am truly capable of becoming.