Blogging … What on earth is that? I remember asking myself when I was playing Sims on Xbox years ago. Ah the Sim is sitting at a computer madly thumping keys. Obviously something online. But at that time in my life I was discovering what my children and then husband were playing … on Xbox … and my only opportunity was late at night. Typical for a mother in a way. My children bought me an Xbox for Christmas .. so I could play games. Or perhaps so they could play when they visit … tho given I live the opposite side of the continent this has not occurred … yet. And neither has my game playing. Blogging, or journalling to may way of thinking, however has .. and with rampantly flowing thoughts and themes and ideas that I want and perhaps need to pull out of my over active mind and transcribe to print.
Journalling, electronically, for all the world to see. Not hidden in numerous paper notebooks for my eyes only. I have very little to hide these days. Reading ‘Creative Journal Writing’ by Stephanie Dowrick, I now understand the beauty and satisfaction journalling has in its many forms. A catharsis of sorts. And much needed at present, and in deed over recent years. I’m edgy. My foot tapping as I write. I find myself composing in my mind constantly at present. Writers block is definitely not happening at the moment.
What’s interesting is the realisation that it’s a way for me to write creatively, for myself. Not the necessity of university essays, nor the reports, emails, policies and procedures, manuals and similar forms that I undertake on a daily basis in my work. But an opportunity to let my mind fly free. This is therapeutic, and in itself creates opportunities to create even more so. Thoughts, associations, ideas, themes flood my mind in my non-working time. And impinge in the work space too.
After years of repressing my creativity … albeit unintentionally … I opened the flood gates in this area. Years of pent-up emotions and feelings have been let loose. I want to participate in life again. To feel and be free. To be who I am. No longer judging myself, let alone feeling judged. I see the beauty of the world around me now that I have chosen to participate in it again. To learn to live … moment by moment … totally experiencing all that life has to offer. This year is truly a year of living a magickal life. Of finding grace, serenity, peace, gratitude, thankfulness and abundance. Tho if im not careful my work may suffer and that will shift financial abundance. This is a year of living magickally .. not dangerously .. but of living fully. I guess this is what we all, consciously, or unconsciously, aspire to. Of being self-aware.
Reading Dowrick’s book I smile at her comments that journalling does not make one more self-absorbed as some critics in time have believed. Rather it is expansive. Soul searching. Clarifying. Freeing. And in reality brings us closer to our true self. To understanding who we are. And therefore to understanding more the world we live in. Our eyes open, our senses flare, and we drink in all that surrounds us. We feel how we relate to others. And in understanding ourselves we begin to understand those around us. We gain confidence in ourselves. Our backs straighten and we hold our heads high. Almost as if to shout to the world “I am alive. I am here. Right now.”
A favourite saying comes to mind. “Be the kind of woman who when shes wakes in the morning and her feet hit the floor, the devil says, Crap, she’s up!” Face the world. Embrace all it has to offer. For as the beauty Louis Armstrong song says “It’s a wonderful world.” How much we risk missing when we forget to live .. when we forget that this world, this day, this life is truly beautiful. It is a perspective. It is one we can choose to change at any point in time. We can change our thoughts, change our lives. We are human. We are alive. How we choose to live is up to us.